Domestic violence affects everyone

By Yolanda Romero
Staff reporter

Domestic violence is considered one of the most committed crimes throughout the world. It has no boundaries, anyone can be a victim, husband or wife, boyfriend or girlfriend, same sex partners, young or old. However, most victims in reported domestic violence cases are women.

An Emergency Room nurse at North General Hospital, who wished to remain anonymous, said, “we do see men, but often they are too embarrassed to say that their partners hurt them.”

The common misconception is that domestic violence consists only of physical abuse. It doesn’t. It can also be emotional, mental and/or verbal abuses. These forms of abuse are so enrooted in some people that the affects can last forever. The scares may never be visible, but the pain may always be felt.

Research shows that once a man slaps a woman it is more likely from him to do so again, no matter how many promises were made to the contrary. It becomes a cycle of violence that doesn’t stop until the abuser understands the violence they are committing is wrong and realize that it is a criminal offense and gets help. Some may ask, “How can someone hurt the person they love?” Remember, domestic violence is not about love, it’s about controlling the victim.

The batterer isolates their victim from family, friends and any source of support. The abuse wears away the victim’s self-confidence and self-worth. It’s all about the batterer’s ability to make their victims terrified of them to keep them in submission.

Most victims do not report abuse because of the fear of being alone and or the fear their children will grow up with one parent Most victims depend on their partner financially so they endure the abuse.

There are no concrete factors that can explain why men and women assault or abuse each other. Some related reasons are, growing up in a violent family, alcohol/substance, abuse, unemployment and even sexual difficulties. Domestic violence is a public issue, and no one should suffer no matter what reason.

Joseph Maldonado Clinical Social Worker at Highbridge Community Life Center’s Family Service department has experience with domestic violence cases, “This violence has been around for years, historically men could abuse women and why? Because they could and that’s the way it was. Men dominated.” Mr. Maldonado continued, “domestic violence doesn’t make a difference if you are poor, middle class or rich, violence cuts across it all.”

Throughout history, the ccourts have treated victims of domestic violence differently because husbands were at one time allowed to beat their wives. Times have change and in 1977 over 70 % of police departments across the country including New York were trained in crises intervention and later Judges were included. In 1982 over 700 shelters and safe homes to protect victims of abuse and in New York an autonomous organization built three. By 1983, these shelters and homes sheltered nationwide 91,000 women and 131,000 children. There have been more victories since then and one of the best has been, Safe Horizon, an organization that has much recourse for battered women. By calling Safe horizon’s hotline 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. The calls are free no matter what language you speak it will be provided. Assisting with finding shelters, referrals to programs advocacy with the police and crucial services.

Today, Officer Hector Maldonado of the Domestic Violence Unit at the 44th precinct, said that their unit — consisting of 9 officers— roughly gets 600 calls a month. Unfounded or not the officers are obligated to investigate.